Contradictions.

Something that kills you when you have too much of it.... Time
Something that kills you when you don't have too much of it... Money.
The inverse??!!

Following your dreams is supposed to be easy... For some...
Why is it hard for the others though?
Maybe its because of a mistake somebody did ages ago... Why should so many people suffer?
Its kind of scary if you think about it... ONE mistake(?)... Done out of love(apparently)... And you're punished for that?
Wow... That's really sad...

Lets look at the solution...

#1 Suicide.

:O
:)

A personal favorite.
Not enough.
Not fair enough.
Who am I kidding??

#2 An escape plan.

How long?
You know its too late in the future...
:(
You still got a few more years of your life.
Damn it!
It'll be too late for everything you wanna do right NOW.


You know what the worst part is.... You know the only answer is you need to suck it up and wait... and wait.... and wait.... wait.... :|
Plays tricks in your head... in front of your eyes...


#3 Masochism.

Beautiful.
And the scars.
It pushes you away from everybody more than ever...
Holy shit.... I'm talking new levels of loneliness here...
Its like you're in a crowd watching everybody... You only watch, you can't act... You feel a decade older than all the idiotic clowns around you... 18 going on 30 huh... Well its the truth... Funny part is you feel taller as well... XD


#4 Writing.

Temporary.


#5 Real loud music.

Soothing.
Best thing there is.
Gets old soon enough...
Nothing wrong with the music... You just become immune in a while is all...



Conclusion:

Nothing will solve it huh....
Therefore... Receding into your mind and building a wall around yourself is all you can do...
Take nothing seriously... Maybe if you don't feel or see it, it doesn't exist... Maybe it is a nightmare... and you'll just wake up and.. poof... gone....

When my blade is that much closer to my skin I hope you would be that much more farther away... and when I do cut myself I hope you are out of reach and I'll keep loving you from afar....


I feel my twisted scars... Atleast I'm glad that the pain is all mine and none yours...
I wish it were not the case though...


Wishing for nothing but the worst for you....
Predator.